it's only the first day of cny and i cant wait for it to end..
sometimes i really hate my family ---- relatives to be exact
all they do is to keep tossing hurtful comments my way. What is this an asian tradition to poke fun at the ill fated middle child?
what the fuck is wrong with these narcissistic sadistic bitches of life?
they croon over my younger sister.. saying how pretty she is how skinny she is how cute her things are how different and mature she looks now

and then everyone adores the older one about her job about her post schooling life about everything
heck , they even compliment her for her smile in photots when it's exactly the same as mine
. yeah that's what everyone says. that me and my older sister look alike but she's just prettier smarter and everything that im not. the worst part is i have been watching my diet like some fuck and what the fuck happens?i get a
 comment like this:" $%*&((&^%$$#@%^&*( watch your diet"
Me: huh what?
irritating relative: " i said you must start watching your diet''
what the fuck that was the most fucking offensive thing i've heard so far this year.i have been going to the gym and saying no to sinful food so religiously
and on the other hand he said that my plump older sister has slim down, he even said my overweight cousin has lost weight. what the fuck is his problem?

so what if im not as fucking skinny as his anorexic girlfriend? what the hell he's like what? 23, has a son, divorced and is on his third girlfriend?
i am fucking skinner than the two of them and he has to say these to poke at my ego. what do i have a billboard sign over my head that say hey over here!! call me fat or you're a dickhead
what is up with asian relatives? NOONE has passed a single good comment about me today. NOONE. and that';s why i always shut up at gatherings. because there is no one worth talking to. i dont think any one understand how i feel.
except for the rest of the middle childs in the world

i googled and there's something called a middle child syndrome

"Middle kids bemoan their fate as being ignored and often grow resentful of all the parental attention given to the oldest and the baby of the family, and feel short-shifted. Three kids triangulate sibling relationships, with one child at any given point feeling like the odd man out from the chumminess of the other two.
Parents tend to be much more easy-going, less anxious, and less demanding with second and third children. Thus many middle children grow up with a more relaxed attitude towards life than their older siblings; though they have to compete for family attention against the milestones set by the oldest, and growing up in their shadow. Middle children have to try a little harder to “be heard” or get noticed. The middle child usually has to fight harder for the attention of their parents and therefore crave the family spotlight. They may feel that they do not get as much praise as the older children for simple firsts like tying a shoe or riding a bike. Those things just become expected."
 

agreed

Middle Born #1

 

• Loner
• Quiet Shy
• Impatient
• Uptight

Middle Born #2

• Outgoing
• Friendly
• Loud
• Laid back
• Patient

Middle born children are quite difficult to pin down, however they tend to be the opposite of their older sibling. There are however, a few characteristics that both types of middle born share.
Common Traits

• Flexible
• Diplomatic
• Rebellious
• Attention seeking
• Competitive
• Peacemakers

yes hard to believe but i match every single trait here. i can be laid back and yet uptight at times. it's weird but im just like that.
Second Child Characteristics

Because you can't seem to show the same excitement about your second child, as you do with your first-born, he/she is likely to develop certain 'second child traits' so that your attention will be drawn towards them.

• They may not respond to your bout of affection as a way of probably making you feel guilty about not giving them enough time. However, don't let this demotivate you. They want it much more than you could imagine.
• They are likely to do things that get them into trouble, simply as a way of seeking attention from you. Don't allow it all the time, but don't constantly reprimand them for it either.
• Your second child definitely hates a comparison to his older sibling. You simply must not say 'why can't you be like your brother/sister?', because this will further instigate him to behave otherwise.
• You are bound to face a negative attitude, a lot of sarcasm, and persistent anger from them. However, maintain your patience in such situations. These are walls they have built around them, that you can break through only over time with lots of love and affection.
• Because of the ignorance they may have faced, a second child may not be very ambitious, thinking that his efforts are not going to be recognized anyway. A second child may also face problems when it comes to dealing with pressure.
• Not every second child may behave in the aforementioned manner, but it is one of the fairly common behavioral problems in children that you may have to deal with. The second child tends to be a loner, and may not be very great with intimate relationships. He may not value them as much as his older sibling does, and this may manifest into commitment problems in the future.

i definitely have middle child syndrome
im always the worst